It may not look like it to a casual observer, but more often than not, I don’t really know what I’m doing. Sometimes there's a vague idea, a thread I’m following, or a concept being explored. But I rarely KNOW what it is I’m doing until it's well underway. Sometimes I don’t fully understand the thing until long after it’s done.
Couch art is a great example. I started doing it during a particularly busy period of my life - a phase where getting into the studio was hard to make time for. So I set a sketchbook and couple of pens by the couch where I watch TV with my main dude of an evening. With no idea what to do there; or what I even wanted to do. Just a need to hold a pen and draw or doodle a bit to unravel my thoughts.
Over time I came to realize that each time I practice taking a step into some kind of action in my couch art journal - and follow that step with another and another until there is a finished page - I strengthen the courage muscle to take a step toward a desired outcome, even when I don’t know what I’m doing, in other areas of life.
Our brains are like astonishing maps with roads and highways and back lanes - each time we repeat an action, the road we take becomes more permanent, until our internal GPS recognizes that track and sets it as our default. (At least, that’s my rudimentary understanding of our incredible neural function). Practicing taking a step into the unknown in a safe place (in this case, a journal) makes the pathway more robust when it comes to taking a step into the unknown in more scary places.
Years ago, these words landed on an art journal page: I don’t know what I’m doing, but I’m doing it anyway. How often do we want an outcome, but have no idea HOW to reach it? What I’ve discovered is that if you take one tiny, uncertain step toward the thing you want, the next step shows itself. Eventually all those tiny, uncertain steps land you right where you wanted to go.
What tiny step (in Wayfinder coaching, we call them turtle steps) could you take this week towards something that feels inviting to you? Not sure what your turtle step could be, or even what feels inviting? Helping you figure those things out is at the core of my coaching practice. Book yourself a complementary initial session and let's see what we can uncover for you.